How to Ask Questions that Yield Information and Build Relationships

Learn a practical technique to help you formulate questions that get more than just short “yeses” and “nos” - learn to ask questions that get meaningful responses.

Have You Ever Been in This Situation?

It’s your Monday morning meeting with the team. As always, you review plans and goals for the week. And, as always, you ask for input from the team: Do they have any questions? Any concerns? Any thoughts they want to share? Your team’s feedback is important to you. But the responses are minimal – just a few mumbled "yeses" and "nos". Why?

It could be the way you ask.

Understanding Closed and Open Questions

A graph contrasting open and closed questions. The sentence: How you ask shapes the answer you get.

In English, there are two main types of questions: closed questions and open-ended, or simply open, questions. The type you choose shapes the response you'll get. Whereas a closed question tends to shut down conversations, an open question can encourage real input, spark discussion, and even make difficult conversations easier.

Closed Questions: It's Either Yes or No

Closed questions are also called “yes/no” questions, because they can be answered with a brief “yes” or “no”. The answer may also repeat part of the question. Whether someone simply responds with “yes” or “no” or adds part of the question to their response, as the person asking, you will not gain much new information.

Did you finish the report?

Yes (I did).
Yes, I finished it.

Are you satisfied with our product?

No (we're not).
No, we're not satisfied at all.

Need a refresher on how closed questions work? Scroll to the end of the post.

Open Questions: You Want to Find Out More

Open questions are also called “w-questions” because they start with a question word - and most question words start with “w”: who, when, where, what, why, etc. Open questions cannot simply be answered with “yes” or “no”. They require more information and are therefore also referred to as information questions.

Where can I find the finished report?

I uploaded it to our shared site.
I'm afraid I haven't finished it yet, but I'll get it done this afternoon.

How do you feel about our new product?

We love the design.
The colors are beautiful, but it's really hard to clean.

Need a refresher on how open questions work? Scroll to the end of the post.

When Closed Questions Work

There are times when a closed question makes sense because you want a decisive and specific answer. You may even want your counterpart to feel the pressure of having to make a firm decision or commit to something.

When Open Questions Are Better

Whenever you need information, require clarification, or want to engage your team in a discussion, choose open questions. They encourage your conversation partner to share their thoughts – and provide you with better insights into their priorities, needs, and expectations.

Let’s look at the following example to see the difference:

Closed:

"We have about 10 minutes of meeting time left. Does anyone have any questions about the procedure?" – There's a good chance that your team will shake their heads and mumble "no". Many people don't like speaking up in front of others and admit they didn't understand.

Open:

"We have about 10 minutes left before we close. What aspects of the procedure should we review to make sure we're all on track? What would be most helpful to you?" – The open question style shifts the focus from the team member(s) who didn’t understand to the topics that are challenging. What's more, it shows your - the asker's - willingness to help.

Handling Difficult Conversations

In difficult conversations and sensitive situations, open questions can be particularly useful as they help

reduce defensiveness: Rather than putting someone on the spot, they invite discussion.
gain insight into the other person’s perspective: They help uncover motivations, emotions, or reasoning behind a person's opinions and decisions.
keep the conversation productive: They shift the focus from blame or confrontation to problem-solving.

Those of you who are regular readers of my blog know that I'm a proponent of brevity and conciseness: keep it short and simple. Yes - open questions are often longer than closed ones, but brevity is not the priority here. Clarity and engagement matter more. A well-structured open question invites thoughtful responses, which ultimately leads to a deeper and more useful conversation.

Five Steps From Closed to Open

Turning a closed into an open question can be challenging, but it’s something you can learn! It takes five steps:

Pay attention to your own habits - how do you tend to phrase your questions?
Identify closed questions. Simply look for words like “Do/Did/Is/Are/Can etc.”
Reflect on what you would like to learn by asking.
Rephrase the question using a question word, such as “How/What/Why”.
Expand the question to invite details about what you want to learn.

Practice this regularly and it will become second nature!

Depending on what you want to learn and achieve, there's usually more than one way to rephrase a question.

Closed: Do you have any concerns with this approach?

Open 1: How do you feel about this approach?
Open 2: What concerns do you have with this approach?
Open 3: What's your experience with this approach?

Each open question has a slightly different angle, but all are more likely to engage your counterpart than the closed question.

How Closed Questions Work: A Brief Refresher

Closed questions start with

an auxiliary (“helping”) verb, such as “do, did, does, is, are, have, etc.”

or a modal verb, such as “can, could, will”, etc.

followed by the subject (we, you, etc.)

and the main verb (write, meet, etc.) and

sometimes other sentence parts, such as an object.

Did you write the report?

Did (=auxiliary/helping verb) you (subject) write (main verb) the report (object)?

Note: The verb “to be” can also be a main verb:

Are you hungry?
Is he in the conference room?

How Open Questions Work: A Brief Refresher

The question starts with a question word, followed be the “helping” word or a modal verb, then the subject, then the main verb, and then other sentence parts, such as an object.

Where can I find the report?

Where (question word) can (modal verb) I (subject) find (main verb) the report (object)?

Note: If the question word is the subject or part of the subject, then you don’t need an auxiliary verb. This is only possible with the question words: who, what, which, and whose.

Who wrote the report?
Which vendor is better?

Effective communication is about using the right strategies. Reach out to me if you want to strengthen your skills and learn practical strategies for communication that gets results.

Contact Me